Thursday, August 22, 2013

{36w2d, Round 2}

So...36 weeks.

So much has happened, and I keep procrastinating when it comes to upates, mostly because I don't know where to start. Shortly after I finished my Microbiology class, I came back to work full time-for a few different reasons-and suddenly I woke up nine months pregnant. When our littlest love arrives I won't work for at least three months, and then transition back in part time, but for now everything is a little crazy.

But I'm soaking in every single second, because I'm told it's only going to get crazier.

Scarlett Grace is almost two and a quarter, going on twenty-two. My goodness that child is sassy. And we have no cable TV, Satelite, Netflix, or any of that other fancy stuff, so I can't even blame it on the Television, which means it's probably my own fault. A few of her favorite phrases right now are a very dramatic "Oh goodness, I don't like that, Thats like freaking me out, That bothers me, and my personal favorite, that's not necessary.

But despite her dramatic attitude and demanding personality, she really is just...amazing. And at a very healthy 33lbs and 38" tall-niether her father nor I are small, so I suppose having a delicate, petite child wasn't really ever expected-her personality is matching her extierior. She's so incredibly smart, determined, strong-willed, gorgeous, and refreshing. Sometimes I feel like I'm talking-and arguing-with a teenager, but I wouldn't change anything about her.

She's as prepared as she can be for her baby sister, and talks often about holding her and rocking her. She's almost completely potty trained too, which is something I was avoiding because I thought it would be a nightmare, but she took to it right away and really suprised us with her love of panties and the toilet. Even the trasition from the crib-converted-to-a-toddler-bed to her big girl bed went smoothly, and it didn't phase her a bit to see the converted crib set back up as a crib for her sister. So I really do have high hopes for the new babies survival, and absolutly no concerns about the shared room.

Our tiniest human and I are doing well too, I just adore being pregnant. Even though this pregnancy started off a little rough, I really have been blessed. I'm a little bigger this time arround and my stomach actually looks like a regular, round pregnant belly, but I'm still measuring just a couple weeks behind and she is healthy. There really is nothing in the world that compares to growing a tiny human in your uterus. And though I'm exctied to meet her and get to know her on the outside, I will very much miss having her on the inside. Feeling her move and wiggle every day is just a reminder of how good God is, and how good He's been to me. The way I see it, I'll have an entire lifetime to hold her and kiss her, but for now, she's growing under my heart-right where she belongs-and I'm in no rush for her to exit just yet.

And other than being diagnosed loosely with gestational diabetes this time arround, we've really had no complications. My morning sugars are sometimes boarderline, but that's really it, so I haven't had to change my diet or take insulin; though I have it if I need it. My attitude this pregnancy is just so different than last time; I really am able to take things as they come. I don't have a strict diet or excersize plan-though I should-I have no birth plan, and even gestational diabetes doesn't phase me. I have this complete peace that God is in control, and that He will provide for and take care of this blessing that He's created.

And suprisingly, I'm not even plagued with the very normal fear of being able to love another child. Though the thought crosses my mind from time to time, I'm just not concerned; mostly because I know that God created a mothers heart to be perfectly capable of expanding. It's happened once before, and I have faith that it will happen again and again, as many times as it takes. I'm also aware that there will be a period of adjustment for our little family as this new gift is added, but I'm prayerfully prepairing for that as well, and I'm trusting God to make that transition a smooth one for us, like only He can do.

So, pretty boring, right? No complaints, no fears, no worries...I hardly recognize myself. I feel like so much has happened, so much is going on, but it's almost as if I'm standing in the middle of the hurricane, right in the eye of the storm. Everything arround me is spinning, but I'm safe. Protected. Peaceful.

Maybe this means something big is coming, and God's prepairing me for it. Or maybe it simply means I'm finally learning to trust Him, to take things one day at a time, and to look less at what's going wrong, and more at what's going right.

I'm unexpectedly growing a healthy, second human. The one I already have is pure sunshine. And with way more to be thankful for than I deserve, I am just in awe of the blessings that keep flowing.

Oh, how He loves us!

“Reflect upon your present blessings-of which every man has many-not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some.”
Charles Dickens